C. Moore Glootz’s Fun from Rear

ALL KINDS OF TROUBLE

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Problem is, as C. Moore’s other writings have already revealed to you, it isn’t so easy to convince people that apparently matter – judges and so forth – that this very message isn’t apparent to C. Moore on every single tight little muscle butt he sees.

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Seems like the UK legal system is bent on fixin’ old C. Moore. Curin’ myself of my prede-lick-tions. But tell me, your honour, is she or is she not lookin’ at herself in that mirror wonderin’ how many accidents in pants she’s gonna cause today? Is she or is she not aidin’ and abettin’ C. Moore in his so-called “anti-social” ways with her choice of glootwear? Seems to me, your honour, that C. Moore is the VICTIM here.

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Have I really acted, as you say, “outrageously”? I put it to you, sir, that the outrage was really the choice of outfit. The outrage was the public display of divine glootage.

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C. Moore freely admits that questionable decisions have been made by my good self. Joining Eleonora on stage, a sweaty hand on each cheek, was not the best. [C. Moore’s infamous on stage appearance was made right after he had snapped the above pic – ed.] C. Moore needed a new set of teeth post-incident. Julie Bonnett‘s heels sure packed some power, believe. No excuses, lesson learned. Stage is for glootage display, not for C. Moore. Ensuing lifetime ban not unreasonable methinks. Still, je ne regrette rien. Knowin’ Eleonora’s glooteal hardness even for that fleeting moment before the pain began was worth every penny of the hospital and dental bills.

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And most recently was I in traction after trying to help out the above. Am sure those hot pants told me she wanted to know how hard her deadliftin’ was makin’ that ass. Was sure, and AM sure. Anyway, next thing C. Moore knows is that he’s finding out how hard she can punch him in the balls. So you know, she can punch HARD.

Like I said, VICTIM!

Abs Week: Just Abs

Before I started doing the blog, I used to organise pics I collected into themed folders (a little trainspotty I know, but there you are). You won’t be surprised to learn that one of the themes I returned to again and again was ‘Abs’. And while I was going through those folders to prepare for this week’s post, I found one called ‘Just Abs’. This isn’t a selection from that folder, the images today are much more recent than that, but that’s where the inspiration from today’s post came from.

Abs, the whole abs and nothing but the abs…

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Not a sight you’d complain about if you were coming home to it night after night. Never mind your abs, darling, where’s my dinner? would be an odd thing to say. Hold that pose and I’ll just grab some champagne to lick off your beautiful muscles would be a much less strange reaction, don’t you agree?

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I think you’re starting to burn, darling. Better get some cream on. Shall I? Meanwhile I’m thinking that I cannot wait to see her bronzed abs above her tan line. This holiday was definitely worth forking out for!

left: I think the abs may have been added to this image by a skilled hand (which rules me out). I’m not saying this either because I care if they are real or not (I don’t) or because I’m good at spotting fakes (I’m appalling) but simply because I vaguely recall getting this image from an art site rather than a photo site. Vaguely. Anyway, real or not, aren’t they pretty?
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right: Now I’m 99% sure this image is real, even though the abs are bloody well UNREAL! Up the middle there are cuts that remind me of the hallmarks you see on silverware. And as far as the external obliques are concerned, well, I for one would like to see how they end up.

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Another set of abs that gets me thinking about all sorts of ‘dream girlfriend’ scenarios, not least the one where I’m taking the picture (think about where I would have to be and where her head would be). Crude, I know, but hey, the ‘clean’ scenarios are not nearly as interesting.

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This very lickable set of abdominal muscles belongs to Eleonora Dobrinina, who is not, as the name might suggest, a Russian, but a Canadian WBFF pro. You can follow ‘Ella’ and her abs on Twitter and Facebook if you like what you see, and believe me, she really likes showing off her abs. I LOVE the smiley face in the corner of the left-hand picture. Very sweet and simultaneously devilishly sexy.

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The top rolled up a bit, and the shorts pulled down a bit. Yummy.

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Again, rolled up and pulled down. This time with a tan. Therefore, yummier!

left: Serious Abs I
Could they be any more ripped, pumped and sexy?
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right: Serious Abs II
A veritable abdominal anatomy lesson. If you can see anything here except skin and muscle then you have a keener eye than I do. Wow! I think this may be Yvetta Balla‘s incredible midsection, can anyone confirm or refute this? Apologies for my lack of certainty today, it’s just that looking at all these images has scrambled my brain a bit. Or at least I think it has.

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And finally for today, Lena Hedblad, and what looks like what her abs looked like on the day of a contest. I’d say she was ‘contest ready’, wouldn’t you?

More amazing abs tomorrow. Enjoy!