À la recherche du chaude et dure perdu: Michelle Neil

REMEMBRANCE OF HOT AND HARD PAST

5. Dr. Feelgood

In a short, and sadly long lost, clip from around 2006, a Femflex (I think) crew is shooting contestants back stage. A vision of incredible, heart-stopping size and conditioning, her hair as golden as her tan, starts flexing for the camera. They ask her her name. Without skipping a pose, she tells them. Then, there’s a fairly long pause (these clips were generally quite chatty affairs). Off camera, a kind of awed silence for this amazing specimen, punctuated by assorted gasps and wows while she just keeps flexing, her muscles rippling, bulging, exploding. Finally, one of the crew speaks.

You sure are gonna be hard to keep out of the top three.

She looks over a thick, shredded shoulder at the offending crew member.

I’m gonna be hard to keep out of the top ONE, she says.

That was my introduction to the wondrous Dr. Michelle Neil, one of those women, one of those bodies, that seemed to arrive fully-formed. Even when she was still competing at regional level she had the ability to make experienced female muscle watchers turn to jelly – as this clip where Dave Palumbo claims to be interviewing her but just kind of drools intead will testify (scroll down a bit, it’s there).

Michelle seemed to know she was special, and that confidence – I don’t think it counts as arrogance if you really are the best – combined with her spectacular physique to make treasures of each and every one of her photo sets and video clips. I could have chosen one of her posing clips from her 2007 Nationals triumph, or some of her work with Awefilms. There’s that Femflex “Mini-Movie”, six minutes of Michelle’s muscles close-up and bulging out of a tight black dress, or an FTVideo webcam clip where she displays muscle control (pecs, abs, glutes) that still moves me to this day.

In the end, I plumped for a photo set by the often forgotten (and now gone) bodyelite.net with Michelle’s aptly elite body, you might say, packed into a little black dress – probably not so little on your average woman, but if ever there was a woman who was not average (and not just physically), Michelle was she.

Sadly, as I’m sure many of you already know, the light that burned twice as brightly burned only half as long, and Michelle gave up competing soon after she had won her pro card. She was the victim of massateric hypertrophy as (apparently) that freakishly overgrown jaw thing is known in medical circles, which is where, incidentally, you will find her now, still practising at her clinic in Tulsa, Oklahoma.

Perhaps the secret of her enduring appeal (apart from the presence, the confidence, the body, the insane muscle control etc.) is that her brief career keeps us ever keen. As one forum poster and Michelle devotee gushes, Michelle, you should be among the stars with your heavenly muscular body, especially that back, that face, those eyes of blue and golden hair! And then adds, there are two things I wish I had: photos of her workout routine and some topless shots! See? She left us wanting more.

Lawdy I am enjoying these posts even if no one else is!

Another day, another memory tomorrow…

THREE DAYS OF HOT and HARD VOTING LEFT!

Review last year’s list: 100 to 81, 80-61, 60-41, 40-21, 20-11 and the top 10 on FMS passim, or download PumpItUp’s Hot and Hard 100 2014 pdf.

Rules and how to vote here.

Backstage of the Day

The Pump

On the day of the show, you’ve either got it (muscle) or you don’t. You won’t put on any new muscle size. The only thing pumping will help is to slightly increase muscle size and significantly bring out muscle vascularity. For the record, it’s important to have each muscle thoroughly warmed up before going out on stage.

This helps to prevent muscle pulls, overexertion, and cramping. The primary muscles that need pumping are the shoulders, chest, back, and arms. In addition, the calves and legs may need some light work. If you pump any muscle up too much, you’ll lose definition.

Too much blood will fill the muscle and cause the muscles to appear smooth. It will also cause you to lose muscle control, resulting in excess trembling or uncontrollable shaking during posing.

For shoulders, only perform a few light weight, high rep sets. Do only enough to get a pump. For chest, a light bench press with dumbbells or push-ups is all that is needed. For the back muscles, use high rep dumbbell rows and towel pulls with a partner.

For arms, a basic dumbbell curl with light to moderate resistance is best. The triceps can be trained with dips and towel extensions with a partner. The legs can be warmed up by performing calf raises with a light weight as well as a set of squats (with or without weight).

This will get some warm blood in the muscles helping to increase vascularity in the legs. Stiff-legged deadlifts can also be performed to warm up the hamstrings.

One thing I didn’t mention that beats every pump-up exercise is flexing and posing. This will naturally warm the body up and help increase vascularity. By practising poses, your body will automatically begin to warm up and become vascular.